Sofia's birth - the good, the bad and the gruesome

It all started about 3 am Monday, when I went to the toilet and sprung a slight leak on the way down the stairs. It did occur to me that this might be my waters breaking but I also thought 'Hmm - clearly I haven't done enough pelvic floor exercises and now I'm losing control of my bladder - how embarassing!'

So I went back to bed and fell asleep again, not giving it another thought.

At about 7 am, Jules and I got up and I told him about this. He said 'Do you want me to stay home?' and I said 'Well, I guess you could take the morning off and we could go see the obstetrician at least.' (I had an appointment to see her at 11 am anyway.)

By the time I was having breakfast at 8 I was having slight period cramp-type feelings. So I rang the Birth Centre midwife and had a very calm conversation, in which she said 'Oh well, come in at 11 for your appointment and we'll see.'

By 9 o'clock they were definite contractions, so I called back and this time she said 'Ignore your obstetrician appointment and come up to the Day Assessment Unit.'

Jules rang a cab around 9.30 and when it arrived at 9.40 I was struggling to be able to walk down the stairs. I had several really strong contractions on the way to the hospital and was very glad the traffic was light. At 10 am we got to the hospital and I got out of the cab and leant heavily against a parked car. Then we got into the lift and I had to lean against the wall there as well. When we got to the 5th floor birth centre reception, it was closed and you couldn't get through the doors as they had a security system. I just held onto the railing around the wall and moaned.

Luckily a passing midwife spotted us and nipped through to get help. Two days later she dropped into the ward and said 'Oh, hello, so you had your baby then.' I just looked at her - I had no idea who she was. I vaguely remembered meeting someone quite helpful and female, but I had no idea of any details like what she looked like.

So we were shown straight through into a private room in the birth centre. I took off all my clothes immediately and got into a nightshirt and the midwife (Suzie, very nice) examined me and said 'You're fully dilated.' Which was an incredible surprise - basically I was going to have the baby in less than 2 hours!

Then there was some time where I just squatted beside the bed and moaned a lot, with Jules saying 'You're doing really well, Rac' and rubbing my back and Suzie checking occasionally with a mirror and saying things like 'Well, there's the baby's head.'

Then I was allowed to push, which was a huge relief - it was all I felt like doing by that point. Jules told me later that when Suzie said to stop pushing and pant, it was because the head was out and she had to hook the cord over the head but I had no idea what was happening at the time.

And I did that thing that I was sure would be humiliating and embarrassing - i.e. squeezing out a poo while you're pushing - but Suzie just folded up the padded square that it fell onto and whisked it away. (Jules says, for the record, that he also did this and some bottom-wiping. I'm sure that this is more information than anyone wants, but isn't he a trooper?)

These padded squares are great - just like a sanitary towel only about ten times the size - there was a whole trash can full of them covered in blood and gunge by the end but the room was still clean.

So Sofia came out in a rush and Suzie grabbed her and handed her to Jules. Then I was told to lean back into a bean bag and they gave her to me, all covered in vernix (white gunge) and with the cord still attached. And apparently I made funny noises and said 'Oh, there you are' and was quite emotional. I just remember someone telling me it was a little girl - and being thrilled it was over.

Except it wasn't - then they had to get the placenta out (a natural delivery, not sped up by an injection. Suzie asked me and I said that was what I wanted - apparently hospitals are often too busy and go for the injection, not because it's better but because it's faster.) That was ok, but it was absolutely massive - at least as big as Sofia.

And then my uterus wouldn't contract properly and I lost 350 mls of blood so I had to have a syntocinon drip put in and stay connected to that for four hours.

I also had a small tear so that had to be stitched. On Sunday I had read the handout from NCT class about doing perineal massage and thought to myself 'Yeah, I should start doing that really, so I don't tear'. Oops - too late! They had to insert a large tampon thing to stop the bleeding from the uterus getting in the way and that REALLY hurt. That was actually worse than the labour! Most of the stitches are internal - you can only see one at the surface.

Jules meanwhile had Sofia to hold and she was weighed (5 lbs 8 oz or 2506 grams) and had her Vitamin K injection in the thigh which she really didn't like.

Sofia was born at 11.18 am and we got to stay in the private room until 11.30pm. Then I got wheeled down to the postnatal ward, where four mothers share a big room with four curtained cubicles and Jules had to go home.

The paediatrician came to visit at 1 am, which was a bit weird. She was meant to come during the day but ran out of time. Anyway Sofia was fine - just a bit small but without any obvious problems.

All in all I have no complaints about the Heath Birth Centre or the Royal Free Hospital. The food was pretty good and there was plenty of it which was lucky because I was ravenous the whole time. It also had plenty of fibre e.g. bran flakes for breakfast and lots of fruit and vegetables so when I finally had a bowel movement it was not painful and I didn't worry about the stitches breaking, which the books say most people panic about, because they're quite constipated. Have I talked enough about bowel movements yet or do people want more?!

Several people demonstrated breastfeeding for me, but the most useful person was not the breastfeeding specialist but one of the midwives who had similar-sized breasts to me and showed me what she would do if she were me. And that worked - whereas some of the other holds and positions just didn't.

I stayed two nights in hospital because there was a mix-up with my paperwork, which only the obstetrician could sort out, and she was unavailable at the end of day two. But that worked out well, because Sofia finally got the hang of breastfeeding the second night.

Jules was delighted that the birth centre had his surname in its title, and we took a picture of Sofia in her carseat under the 'Heath Birth Centre' sign. The tag around Sofia's ankle said 'Baby Matheson' but I'm happy for her to be a Heath, when it comes down to it.

All in all it was a positive experience and one that Jules has just described as 'probably the greatest experience of my life'. We feel very lucky.